Keepin' It Lite

I love Friday afternoons.  I always have.  I remember leaving the high school parking lot with my early 90's hair.  It was permed, hair-sprayed, and very big hair. Yes, I had hair....lots of it.  I got in my little black and pink pinstriped pontiac fiero and raced out of there.  Literally.  With a smile on my face and my hair in the wind. I had no cares in the world.  I am quite certain I had White Snake or Def Leppard blaring.  Speakers in the head rest.  Brilliant!!!  I loved my set of wheels.

Today I noticed that when each of my children walked through our door, they had smiles on their faces.  They threw their backpacks down, and sat up for a snack. They always have so much to say on Friday afternoons.  They are relaxed and we laugh and share stories.

As I was going through Reid's homework folder, I saw the paragraph that he had been working on at school all week.  It goes like this:

Cats
By Reid Marchant

You will learn about cats.  Lets get started.  Some cats can be dumb.  They like to chase dragonflies.  You can throw kittens like a football.  Some cats can be little devils like some one I know had to throw one off of him.  Now you know about cats.

We were in the kitchen reading this paragraph.  We were all laughing so hard and he had so much to say about his dislike for cats.  We were all nearly crying.....  I love having children who share and make our home fun.  For a moment, I was that teenager with the wind through my hair listening to Def Leppard with not a care in the world.

Chutes and Ladders

We all remember the favorite childhood game Chutes and Ladders.  I remember playing it with my siblings and then again with my own children.  I was asked to email another young mom with breast cancer.  As I was thinking how to relate cancer to our lives, this game kept coming to mind.  

Just like the little people who we move on the game board, we are all wanting to move ahead.  We all have plans, we are all searching for the best way to climb our "ladders".  We are busy making choices everyday about how we spend our time.  We care for our children, husbands, our loved ones.  We have dreams for our future.  Often times, just when we are stretching to grasp that very last step on the ladder, we are dealt a shiny little card that says, "not this time", and we spiral down the chute.  

I relate to this game.  Having metastatic breast cancer is a lot like chutes and ladders.  Most times I am doing well.  I am climbing my ladder and my chemotherapy drugs are working.  I am getting sleep and home life is running somewhat normal......our "new"normal.  And then, B-A-M, just like that, you have a scan that shows new growth, or my cancer antigen numbers are rising and we can not figure out why.  And now, I  am falling down that darn chute again.

I don't feel like this only relates to cancer.  I love the quote, "Be kind,everyone you meet is facing a battle." Perhaps, I am the lucky one.   My battle is  easy for others to see.  With my head scarves, my wigs, and when I feel really brave, my little bald head.

Let us be sure to be kind to everyone today as we are all climbing up our ladders.  Most importantly, let us catch those who are on their way down their chute. 

Pioneer

I've been thinking about the Summer that our family just shared.  The word pioneer has been on my mind so much.  Our Summer came and went so quickly, as most summers do.  This summer was so busy and full of many lessons.  

I had a birthday this summer, on pioneer day.  To me this is a gift. I am a pioneer with a new breast cancer drug that it working so well to fight off those nasty cancer cells.  I just wish I wasn't so darn tired at 8:00 every single night.  I am continually trying to be brave and courageous. Mostly, I just want to be enchanting. 

Paul, Lindsey, and Brock truly did have a pioneer experience.  They had the opportunity of actually going on Trek with our Ward this Summer.  There was a lot of grumbling from our teenagers,  and hours of conversations about why they had to go.  They felt like they have their own hardships, why would they dress up and pretend they were pioneers.  They would say, mom, those pioneers didn't have it easy, but neither do we.  We have to face things those early pioneers couldn't even dream about.  I understand their plea....I've seen the halls at their schools, I have heard the songs on the radio, I have seen the advertisements that are in front of them every single day.  I also understand that as we fight together as I go through breast cancer, it can sometimes feel lonely and scary for them.  

They were assigned a name of a pioneer to walk for.  They were able to learn about their history, where they were from, their family dynamics and how they felt as they crossed those bitterly cold plains without enough food, clothing, or supplies. They had a new perspective as they were on the same trail and shared their stories with the others in the group.  

I am just so sad that I could not be their to watch.  I had every intention of going.  Why shouldn't I?  As time came closer, I understood why.  Those long hot days would not be good for me.  I didn't want to risk my health and the rest of my summer with my family.    It broke my heart that I could not be their with Paul and my children.  I know that they had their testimonies strengthened.  For that, I am thankful

Olivia is in a new school.  Pioneering her way through new teachers, friends, and classrooms.  Her days start early and she gets up and ready without  complaining.....she truly is a little fighter.  She makes things work and isn't afraid to change them if they aren't. 

Reid is getting baptized Saturday. I am grateful for the opportunity to be here with him to witness it.  Another tender mercy that I have been given.  He is so strong and confident.  I know he will be a pioneer as he grows.  He is such a teacher of goodness even at this young age.

 We are all pioneers as we are thrown into situations that we aren't sure about.  But just as the early pioneers who came across those dusty treacherous plains, we have angels watching over and helping us. We are never alone.