We have been having many conversations about the "C" word in our home the last several weeks. Yep, "College". How in the world did our beautiful baby girl turn into a beautiful High School Senior? What happened to my little girl who loved singing nursery rhymes? We would spend hours singing these little rhymes. All I would have to do is say the first sentence and she would finish. She had three years to be our only child. We had a lot of fun with her. She has had Paul wrapped around her finger from day one. She truly is amazing. She has been such a gift to have in our home. And now she is on her way wanting to fly on her own. I'm not sure I'm ready to watch that first flight. I watched the hawks in the fields this Summer. I noticed when the babies were by the mother birds. The mamas would show them how to fly, how to get their dinner, and how to return back up to the wire to sit by their family again. Did these mother hawks have a knot in their throat too? I bet they did, just as I have one in mine. She should fly, its the next step in her life. She is ready, we have taught her all she needs to know. I hope we have done as good of job of those mother hawks I watched so carefully.
I think back to the day Paul and I brought her home. We were so young. He helped my mom and I get her into the car seat and made sure I was doing well. My mom and I drove Lindsey to our little apartment and Paul went to take a test at the University. It was the first real snow storm in Logan that year. It was quite and beautiful. I remember looking out the window wondering what was ahead for our little family. I was thankful, nervous, hopeful, and not sure what to do with my new angel sent to our home. We loved her, read to her, and made sure she felt safe. We have moved across this country several times. She has made amazing friends in Georgia. She was there for 8 years. She only wishes she would have picked up that Southern drawl. We took her to Ohio. Again, wonderful friends who have supported her and our family. We treasure these friendships and love our friends that we have met along the way. She has been through a lot. A mom with cancer, new friends, new schools, and new homes. She has done remarkably well. How is she so brave? Does she know how proud we are of her and the determination and kindness she shows? I sure hope so.
As I got my second cancer diagnosis my heart felt it was breaking in a million little pieces. All I could think of is not being with my children when they were ready to fly. Who was going to make sure they were really ready to go? Who would be on the power line with her? Would Paul have this responsibility all to himself? I made a promise to myself that I would be there with all my children. I am grateful that I am the mother hawk with a beautiful girl on my side standing on the wire with her as she prepares to fly.
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